Summer Freedom with a therapist in Queens

Finding Freedom as a Parent with a Therapist in Queens

Dear therapist,

It’s July, and everywhere I turn, people are talking about freedom. Supposedly, this is the season of ease, fun, and spontaneity. But I’m a mom of several young kids, and summer is anything but freeing. I feel like I always have to be “on” with planning, feeding, entertaining, cleaning, redirecting. With no school or structure, I’m constantly pulled in a million directions. Honestly, I feel more trapped than ever. Am I the only one who feels like summer is the opposite of freedom?

You’re Not Alone in Feeling Overwhelmed

Response:

No, you are absolutely not alone in feeling that way! What you’re describing is very common for parents of young children, especially when the structure of the school year disappears. Summer often highlights the gap between what we expect life should be like, and what it actually feels like: messy and exhausting. Add social media to the mix, and it becomes disorienting to see the difference between what’s portrayed and your present reality.

If what you’re experiencing goes beyond day-to-day stress- if you’re noticing persistent sadness, anxiety, irritability, or hopelessness- it may be more than the typical overwhelm of parenthood. In that case, reaching out to a therapist in Queens can be an important step. You don’t need to carry the weight alone. As someone who provides relationship counseling in Queens, New York, I know how much relief and steadiness support can bring, both for yourself and your family.

Rethinking Freedom in Parenting

The more responsibilities you carry, especially for little ones who depend on you, the more freedom can seem out of reach. But freedom doesn’t only come from external changes; it can also come from within. Internal freedom often comes from naming the reality of your situation, reframing expectations, and finding small moments that truly belong to you.

Parenting young children is intense. You’re needed physically and emotionally almost all the time. Naming how hard it is instead of expecting it to be easy is its own form of freedom. There’s relief in not having to fight what’s true.

Finding Freedom Through Structure and Connection

It may sound counterintuitive, but one of the most powerful ways to create freedom is through structure. A simple, flexible rhythm, like outdoor play in the morning, rest after lunch, and one evening reserved for yourself or your partner, reduces decision fatigue, helps kids know what to expect, and creates small windows of time that are truly yours.

Another source of freedom is connection. The kind of connection that nourishes you so you can keep showing up for your children. Whether it’s with your spouse, close friends, or fellow parents, these relationships help you feel less isolated and more grounded. In my work as a marriage therapist in New York, I see how vital connection is for resilience- not just for couples, but for parents navigating daily family life.

Embracing Small Moments of Liberation

Internal freedom can also come from perspective. Viktor Frankl wrote that while we can’t always control our circumstances, we can choose how we relate to them. Freedom might look like sipping coffee while your kids play for 15 minutes, or letting sandwiches and fruit be dinner. It’s not about creating the perfect summer but leaning into the joy that can be found in the real one you’re living.

Freedom also includes knowing when to ask for help- from neighbors, family, or babysitters. Building your support system creates more space inside you to feel secure and connected.

Redefining Summer Freedom

So no, you are not alone, and you are not doing this wrong. While summer with kids may not feel like traditional “freedom,” there’s liberation in embracing reality and making it work for you. A full, noisy life can be freeing in its own way. Freedom comes from knowing who you are, what matters most, and how to nourish yourself in small but meaningful ways.

Enjoy your summer!

If you’re feeling stretched thin and want support, I’m here to help. As a therapist in Queens, I provide individual and relationship counseling in Queens, New York, as well as services as a marriage therapist in New York. Together, we can work toward creating the balance and freedom you need to thrive. Reach out here to schedule a consultation.